Abject Suffering

Episode 60: SwordQuest: EarthWorld

October 26th, 2014 | 25 mins 52 secs

For Sale: Single Chalice, gold. Wands, scepters, gems and scimitars optional, will talk. No negotiation, cash only. I'm on to your games. I've been down this road before. Bow before the zodiac puzzlemaster.

Episode 59: Fester's Quest

October 19th, 2014 | 35 mins 28 secs

TV Land, 2:00 A.M. - The Addam's Family, "Not Without My Kitty." Uncle Fester has a breakthrough and attaches a functioning second dick to himself. Meanwhile, Gomez disrobes and devours Morticia's elbow skin.

Episode 58: Doug's Big Game

October 12th, 2014 | 30 mins 13 secs

Hey everyone, remember Doug? The nineties, am I right? Oh man, life is a grim chore.

Episode 57: Fish Dude

October 5th, 2014 | 27 mins 30 secs

Listeners essentially listen to a podcast, and audio program released over the internet, about an ostensibly bad but actually good video game for the Gameboy called Fish Dude.

Episode 56: The Rocketeer

September 28th, 2014 | 31 mins 26 secs

BREAKING NEWS: Babe Ruth sinks a fly ball right into the cerebral cortex of Joseph Goebbels in this alternate universe where balls are the new phallic symbol.

Episode 55: Fist of the North Star

September 21st, 2014 | 32 mins 4 secs

Gather 'round and hear a tale of how two guys can't decide why they don't like anime.

Episode 54: Hydlide

September 14th, 2014 | 26 mins 58 secs

Cat*fish [kat-fish]: noun. 1. any of various fishes having a fancied resemblance to a cat.

Episode 53: Chex Quest

September 8th, 2014 | 36 mins 41 secs

GENERAL MILLS MEMORANDUM: All Staff. For several fiscal reporting periods, we've all felt the systemic pressure on the Chex brand that arises due to the close relationship between the corn-square vertical and the dairy vertical.

Episode 52: Bébé's Kids

September 1st, 2014 | 31 mins 8 secs

Job Posting: NEEDED - Tone Lōc Lookalike (or: Lōcalike). Does not need to sound like Tone Lōc, I will cover the auditory portion of the ruse. Need to handle infestation of Bébé's kids at my theme park. Will pay in funnel cakes and ride vouchers.

Episode 51: Psybadek

August 25th, 2014 | 30 mins 28 secs

Text found on a flyer of a Bronx corner store: "HEY, YOU KIDS. DROP YOU'RE CYBADEKS AND STOP CONTRIBUTIN TO THE DEGRADATION'S OF SOCIETY. THE NEXT CYPADEK I SEE IS GOING RIGHT IN THE GARBAGE" and then the rest is torn off.

Episode 50: Bad Mojo

August 18th, 2014 | 38 mins 48 secs

Fortune, and good mojo, have ordained that our 50th episode be about a good game that one of us actually played to completion!

Episode 49: Darkwing Duck

August 10th, 2014 | 29 mins 27 secs

Script Treatment: Duck Generations. EXT. -- DAY: Donald, Scrooge, Darkwing, and Jason Alexander waddle into a liquor store, shades perched precariously on their bill. Each squawks incomprehensibly, as if trying to out-fury each other.

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